You Were Made for More Than “I can’t…”

What Limiting Beliefs + Self-Sabotage Look Like in Your Business

(Part 2/3 of What “I can’t…” Means)

You built your business to give you freedom but now you find you’re trapped and stuck by all the rules that have crept in over the years. Let’s break you out of that box and re-ignite that fire that burns deep in your belly.

In Part 1, we were talking about how “I can’t…” is a lie that we’ve heard for so long that we think it’s the truth. And I explained how “I can’t…” sucks your soul and contributes to that fire in your belly slowly dying away.

It’s a big deal and we need to pay attention to it to be the best Entrepreneurs and spouses and parents and friends and mentors and community all-stars that we can be.

Baby, it’s time to bring those embers back to life.

First, let’s learn to recognize the enemy.

Here’s what the “I can’t…” lie usually looks like:

“I can’t move my family because…”

“That’s nice for you, but I can’t…”

“I can’t charge that much because…”

“That would be amazing, but I can’t…”

“I can’t say that to them because…”

“I can’t do that with my business because…”

Here’s the thing: 

You are an O-W-N-E-R!! 

A Business Owner.

You own a Business. There are different rules. Use them.

If you were an employee we’d be having a very different conversation.

But you aren’t! You’re an Owner!

You are one of those crazy Entrepreneurs who flipped a middle finger at the corporate life to go out and create something new and wild and beautiful that would change the world.

You know the most commonly given reason people start their own businesses?

Freedom.

(money is up there but it’s almost always *after* freedom.)

Yup. Freedom. The freedom to make our own life the way that we want it to be without being told what to do every second by some mid-level, micro-managing, know-it-all boss.

That’s us.

We’re the wild ones.

We’re less than 10% of the population and the ones that our friends and family look at with suspicion, confusion, … and a touch of envy.

And yet, years later, years into building and running our business, we can feel the fire dying – or maybe we’re wondering where that fire went because we can’t find it at all.

Why?

Because it turns out that while we said we wanted freedom from being told what to do, we are actually the. worst. boss. ever.

We work 24/7.

Working MORE hours than we ever would in corporate.

We earn less – sometimes MUCH less than we would in corporate.

And we never stop working.

We can’t. It’s in our brains.

Even if we were sitting in an ashram in the deepest, most remote part of India, we’d still be worrying about our biz, that employee that’s under-performing, or where our next client is going to come from – and the impact that all of it is having on our family, our health, and our future.

That isn’t the way it was supposed to be.

And it doesn’t have to be that way.

But most of us don’t know any other way to play the game.

That’s why I get so excited when I hear my clients say, “I can’t…” because your “I can’t…” means we’ve found a rule that you made up that is keeping you stuck.

Yay!!

Every “I can’t…” you’re carrying around is like a smaller box you’ve forced yourself into to be acceptable and safe.

Too many boxes and it feels hard to breathe.

You know what I mean, right? It’s claustrophobic.

Once we unearth that rule and transform it into a choice, you’ve got some of your freedom back and you can breathe a little easier.

In Part 3, we’ll work through 7 steps to changing your “I can’t…” rules into empowering choices that can change your life and business for the better.

Questions? Thoughts? Let me know.

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Vanessa Long

Vanessa Long is creator of the Seasons of Success and author of Discovering Your Passionate Purpose. Focused on providing straight-forward, no b.s. solutions, strategies, and support to move you from where you are to where you yearn to be. It’s time to tap into your purpose and build a life that expresses all of who you were designed to be.